Written by Sahara Powell of Borderline Millennials

Maybe she’s born with it...Maybe it’s actually taken a long time for her to love herself, be proud of who she is, and exude effortless self-confidence.

I have to admit, I’ve been told a few times that I am a super confident person and that statement is always followed with the classic, “How are you so confident?” Let me tell you this— first, I wasn’t always this confident, and second, it took me a while to get to the confidence level I have right now.

Growing up, I was always self-conscious about my hair, height, and weight, among other things. Then as I got older I realized there were more things to be insecure and self-conscious about besides physical appearance. In high school and part of college, I became insecure about money, skills, my job, my car, my friends, and so much! 

Sometime between upper-division college and today, I somehow transformed into this closet-insecure, self-conscious girl, to an outwardly self-confident woman. 

I know, I know, you’re still waiting for me to tell you HOW?! How the heck did I go from being HELLA insecure about everything, to actually being self-confident?

Well, long story short, fake it ‘til you make it. 

No, seriously! I’m being for real. When I reached my lowest self-esteem, something switched in me and I just decided to fake it. I faked all of the confidence people thought I had and eventually I actually started to have true self-confidence. 

In the same way that a negative mindset can turn you into a negative person, a positive mindset can turn you into a positive version of yourself. Let me give you three ways to fake it ‘til you make it and grow self-confidence.

1. Switch Your Mindset. Feed yourself positive affirmations and thoughts, rather than negative ones. The more you tell yourself that you’re not pretty enough, smart enough, awesome enough, the more you’ll actually start to believe that’s true. So, why can’t you do that same, but flip your words! Every day, tell yourself or write down positive things about you. Literally, look in the mirror and say “You is kind. You is smart. You is important.” LOL okay, maybe you don’t have to go full, “The Help” on yourself, but you know what I mean. Feed yourself positive affirmations enough, and you’ll soon see yourself starting to believe and become all of those amazing things!

2. Cultivate a Confident Crew. I am a firm believer that who you surround yourself with is a representation of who you are. Not only do they reflect your characteristics, but when you hang around someone or a certain group of people, you start to pick up on some of their traits and begin to adapt their habits. This happens naturally, so you might as well surround yourself with the type of people you admire and wouldn’t mind becoming similar to. If you’re trying to grow your self-confidence, I recommend you become friends with people who are self-confident themselves and who push and encourage you to be the best possible version of yourself.

2. Build Up Your Skillset. Nothing makes me feel more confident than knowing I have the capabilities to do things for myself. Whether it’s being able to make a great cake, develop a website, or navigate a cross-country road trip successfully, I get confidence knowing that I am capable of SO MUCH! The more skills that I gain, I feel like I level up in life and that level-up just helps to build my confidence up more and more. Like sure, I may not be a size 2, BUT I can tell you exactly how to develop and market your brand soooo I think I’m good. 

So, there you have it! My three ways to grow self-confidence and pretty much crush life! Now, go out there, do something that empowers you and become the you that you’ve always known you can be :D

-Written by: Sahara Powell

IG: @borderlinemillenials

Website: Saharashoots.com